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Jamin 'Skorpion' ColleyInterview by: Jamin "Skorpion" Colley
Spotlighted site: sfpunk.com


A note from Skorpion: As fate would have it, one of the admins from last month's winner, PlanetPlastica, is also an admin at this month's winner, sfpunk.com. There are a few admins over there psycho, dende, Drew and Alex - and we interview a couple of them. And the administration over here has been kind enough to allow me to do another "chat session" style interview. (Thank you!!) This one does run a little longer (and probably has less actual content) than last month's, so I've split it up into two pages. For visual reference purposes, my actual content questions are denoted by the preceding blank line and they are in all yellow text, so you can quickly track the progression (regression? ) of the interview. Well, that's about all from me. Enjoy this, dear viewer, I sure did!

UBBDev: alright, guys, ready to start?
SFP Psychopathic: sure...
SFP Zach: hmm
SFP Zach: lemme brush my teeth first
SFP Zach: i remember we had hidden text on sfp
UBBDev: BUY JAMIN'S CHICKEN!!
SFP Zach: se7enet.com had subliminal messages
SFP Zach: yep
SFP Zach: i won jamin;s chicken!
SFP Zach: $67.01
SFP Zach: i remember
SFP Psychopathic: "What's your background on the web?"
SFP Psychopathic: right?


UBBDev: What is your background with computers, and how did you get started on the web?
SFP Psychopathic: right?
SFP Psychopathic: HAHA!!
SFP Psychopathic: damn i'm good.
SFP Psychopathic: 75mhz. Gateway 2000.
SFP Psychopathic: Oooh yeah.airzach21 has left the room.
SFP Psychopathic: ....
SFP Psychopathic: he'll be back.
UBBDev: fine, i didn't want to talk to him anyway!
SFP Psychopathic: haha
UBBDev: let's talk about him while he's not here...
SFP Psychopathic: yeah, zach is gayairzach21 has entered the room.
SFP Zach: ack!
SFP Psychopathic: oh ahem...
SFP Psychopathic: there he is
UBBDev: We didn't talk about you while you were gone.
SFP Psychopathic: may the zach bashing stop.
SFP Zach: ok, that's good
SFP Zach: give us a good question
SFP Zach: i don't hjave a background on the web
SFP Psychopathic: yeah you do
SFP Zach: i'm only 14 for crying out loud
SFP Psychopathic: you began as my bitch on P2
SFP Psychopathic: and evolved from there
SFP Zach: "i went to p2 for a long time"
SFP Psychopathic: the end.
SFP Zach: that's a crappy answer
SFP Zach: all the other kids will laugh if i say that
UBBDev: No they won't.
UBBDev: They'll just beat you up.
SFP Psychopathic: lets fill this interview with blatant P2 plugs
SFP Psychopathic: and se7enet.com
SFP Zach: yea
UBBDev:
SFP Zach: "so what are tricks of the trade?"
SFP Zach: "well, se7enet.com is cool."
SFP Psychopathic: here's a trick.. make sure you get this one
UBBDev: lmao!
SFP Psychopathic: go register at planetplastica.com
SFP Psychopathic: then it'll all be good.
UBBDev: (Anyone care to guess the next question before I can type it?)
SFP Psychopathic: oh oh oh
SFP Zach: ask me my favorite pair of socks or something
SFP Psychopathic: why'd u purchase a UBB?


UBBDev: So how did you brainstorm the idea behind sfpunk.com?
SFP Psychopathic: right?
SFP Psychopathic: darn.
SFP Psychopathic: it started out one night
UBBDev:
SFP Psychopathic: in a chat like this
SFP Psychopathic: it was supposed to be hashpipe
SFP Psychopathic: but alex got pissy and religious on us
SFP Zach: "well, i like punk music... p2 rocks."
SFP Psychopathic: then we changed it to nfpunk (new found punk)
SFP Zach: but that was gay
SFP Psychopathic: and eventually it made its way to sfpunk.com
SFP Zach: wait
SFP Zach: let's start over
SFP Zach: ask the first question
UBBDev: So, um, what does the "S" stand for now?
SFP Zach: no one knows
SFP Psychopathic: sf = nothing
SFP Zach: actually, it is "synthetic fate" punk
SFP Psychopathic: they're just useless letters
SFP Psychopathic: or that
SFP Zach: or "stupid fudgie" punk
SFP Zach: cuz we are dorks and dunno what to call it
UBBDev: ZACH: What's your background on the web?
SFP Zach: dude!
SFP Zach: this is hard
SFP Zach: ricky, go first
SFP Zach: i need someone to copy
SFP Psychopathic: i already went
SFP Zach: what was yours?
SFP Psychopathic: ok i'll be more elaborate
SFP Psychopathic: i started out making crappy webpages with crappy graphics on hypermart (ugh..)
SFP Psychopathic: i got more into graphics than i did web development, so i pursued that.
SFP Zach: rorhosting.hypermart.net !!
SFP Psychopathic: then i started getting back into web design, so i combined my talents and had my fun.
SFP Psychopathic: Now i control the internet!
SFP Psychopathic: most of it anyway..
UBBDev: Like, how much of it?
SFP Psychopathic: a lot.. i mean, not as much as Al Gore...
UBBDev: oh, ok
SFP Psychopathic: ya know..
UBBDev: i see
SFP Zach: ok, well, it all started when i was a wee one of 11 years old. i went to planetplastica.com and met ricky, and we both sucked at web stuff. he got better and i still sucked, until one day i decided not to suck, and got good.
SFP Psychopathic: Less than Al Gore, but more than George Bush
SFP Zach: the rest is history.


UBBDev: NOW, what made you buy a UBB for the site?
SFP Psychopathic: We bought the UBB for liquid monkeys
SFP Psychopathic: but then it was renamed and re-done for sfpunk.com after LM went down.
SFP Zach: it was the only bb system i know about
SFP Zach: yea
SFP Zach: liquidmonkeys sucked!
SFP Psychopathic: yeah it did
SFP Psychopathic: trash posters everywhere


UBBDev: Truman Show or EdTV?
SFP Psychopathic: Truman Show
SFP Psychopathic: Jim Carrey is god
SFP Zach: Truman SHow you silly goose!!
UBBDev: Truman Show all the way!!
UBBDev:
SFP Zach: :-D


UBBDev: What do you like and dislike most about UBB?
SFP Zach: well, i like that i won this contest
SFP Psychopathic: I like that it's easy to customize and fun to use.
SFP Zach: yes, me too
SFP Psychopathic: i dislike the fact that it's not SQL backended like a certain other service...
SFP Psychopathic: *cough*
SFP Zach: wait, me too
UBBDev: we'll have no talk of certain other services here!
SFP Zach: use ricky's answer
SFP Psychopathic: of course not
SFP Zach: mine sucks
SFP Zach: you stupid phpbb user!
SFP Zach: get outta here you faker!
SFP Psychopathic: :-X
SFP Psychopathic: i'm the phpBB equivalent of skorpion
SFP Zach: ask me the socks question!!
SFP Psychopathic: just a side note
SFP Psychopathic: Champion socks for me
SFP Psychopathic: and occasionally Hanes


UBBDev: What do you do to keep your socks fresh?
SFP Psychopathic: Clean Shoes.
SFP Zach: well, every once in a while, i put them in this thing called a washer, it confuses the heck out of me, but everyone says it's the right thing to do


UBBDev: And what about your content?
SFP Psychopathic: For content, we go to other punk sites and steal their news
SFP Zach: well, we always have news posted and stuff to keep people coming back
SFP Zach: yea, i admit it
SFP Psychopathic: that's the way the internet works
SFP Psychopathic: YOU KNOW YOU'VE (the reader) DONE IT BEFORE!!
UBBDev: So if I were to start a punk site, I could just go to sfpunk.com and copy *all* the news, and let you guys do the research for me?
SFP Zach: yep
SFP Psychopathic: pretty much yeah
SFP Zach: and we wouldn't care, because that's what we do, too
UBBDev: Alrighty then... *makes note of intent to start punk site*
SFP Psychopathic: ours will be better though
SFP Zach: yea
UBBDev: bah!
SFP Zach: cuz we won the cointest
SFP Psychopathic: yeah
SFP Psychopathic: it's all about the contest
UBBDev: have you seen what I can do with toothpicks and a panda fetus?!
UBBDev: mine will be SOOOO much better!
SFP Psychopathic: you got panda?
SFP Psychopathic: crap
SFP Psychopathic: we're done for zach!
SFP Zach: oh man
SFP Zach: not even panda express has panda!!
SFP Psychopathic: :-
SFP Psychopathic: they should
UBBDev: haha!
UBBDev: now you're foiled!
SFP Psychopathic: i want my panda fried rice
SFP Psychopathic: but noooo
SFP Zach: the world is ours!!
SFP Psychopathic: to the readers: BOYCOTT PANDA EXPRESS!!
SFP Zach: they keep all the panda to themselves and say "oh, we don't really serve panda, we just have this name to fool all the panda eaters."
SFP Psychopathic: exactly!!


UBBDev: Has there been any progress on the long-awaited "Hug This User" hack (and it's sister, the "Sexual Harassment Button" hack) ??
SFP Zach: what question are we on?
SFP Psychopathic: Not really
SFP Psychopathic: we're still workin on it
SFP Psychopathic: but keep checkin (www.planetplastica.com) for updates!
SFP Zach: it's mostly just me using it


UBBDev: What is (are?) your favorite UBB mods?
P2 psychopathic has left the room.
SFP Zach: who's online and *compact templates* (se7enet.com)
UBBDev: let's talk about him while he's gone
SFP Zach: ok
SFP Zach: i heard he likes menP2 psychopathic has entered the room.
SFP Zach: if you ask me, he was getting a little too happy about that "hug user" hack
SFP Psychopathic: *walks back in like nothing happened*
UBBDev: We didn't talk about you while you were gone
SFP Zach: nope
SFP Psychopathic: of course not
SFP Psychopathic: why would you do something like that
UBBDev: I dunno... a more preposterous idea I've never heard!

If you haven't already gone insane, click here to continue on to page 2.

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Continuing right were we left off in page one, here is page two of the SFPunk.com interview...

UBBDev: Anywayz, what is on the rise for sfpunk.com?
SFP Zach: nothing, nothing at all
SFP Psychopathic: actually
SFP Zach: no one likes us, so we're gonna go hide in a cave
SFP Psychopathic: we're in the process of creating robots to do our jobs for us
SFP Zach: and eat jell-o
SFP Psychopathic: yes
SFP Psychopathic: green jell-o
SFP Zach: don't forget the -o
UBBDev: no... no... not GREEN!
SFP Zach: you better believe it
SFP Psychopathic: we sure do get off topic easily.
UBBDev: yeah
UBBDev: sucks to be us
SFP Zach: i guess we're just off topic kinda guys
SFP Psychopathic: my mom says i'm a failure.


UBBDev: mp3 player of choice?
SFP Psychopathic: WMP 8
SFP Zach: oh yea, word to drew and alex!
SFP Zach: word is a funny word to use
SFP Psychopathic: WORD UP TO DREW AND ALEX!!
UBBDev: WiMP?!?! You pansy!
SFP Psychopathic: yep...
SFP Psychopathic: i'm a pansy.
SFP Psychopathic: don't tell anyone though
SFP Zach: i prefer burned cd's
SFP Zach: screw you mp3's!
SFP Psychopathic: burned cds cost money.
SFP Psychopathic: $$$$$
SFP Psychopathic: that's right... FIVE $'s
SFP Zach: not if i get them from friends for free
SFP Psychopathic: well then
SFP Psychopathic: that works
SFP Psychopathic: what was i thinking
SFP Zach: it's ok
SFP Zach: i dunno, i guess jamin got to you
UBBDev: prolly
SFP Psychopathic: Jamin likes peanuts.
SFP Zach: speaikng of elephants, mind if i call you tanya, jamin?
UBBDev: Jamin likes planetplastica.com and se7enet.com
SFP Psychopathic: yeah he does
SFP Psychopathic: Jamin loves planetplastica.com
SFP Zach: Jamin better like sfpunk.com!!
UBBDev: nope, i can't stand that place
SFP Zach: Allen loves planetplastica.com
SFP Zach: i heard jamin was a penguin
UBBDev: nope, i like Penguin Mints though
SFP Psychopathic: that's just a rumor
SFP Zach: oh, thanks for clearing that up
UBBDev: mmmm... altoids + caffeine = nifty!
SFP Zach: get a new lavacam pic!
SFP Psychopathic: yeah
SFP Zach: spekaing of lavacam,... *se7enet.com*
UBBDev: ok, i turned it on
UBBDev: it's been having upload problems, though, so i dunno...
SFP Zach: do we have another question?
UBBDev: um...


UBBDev: what size pants do you wear?
SFP Zach: 78
SFP Psychopathic: i wear 32, but i buy 36-38
SFP Psychopathic: cause i'm a thug.
SFP Psychopathic: and i suck.


UBBDev: Oh yeah... do you have any advice for n00b's who don't know anything?
SFP Zach: well, i'm actually a n00b, so... no.
SFP Zach: wait
SFP Psychopathic: people obviously didn't read my advice last time.. for one thing, BUY A LICENSE PEOPLE!!!, and secondly, learn how to match your friggin colors!!
SFP Zach: "i will never share my tricks of the trade!! buahahha!!"
UBBDev: Thank you, Ricky, for those wonderful words of advice.
SFP Zach: and don't have crappy graphics
SFP Zach: and play with templates
SFP Psychopathic: the most important "trick of the trade" is to sign up at planetplastica.com
UBBDev: and se7enet.com
UBBDev: don't forget se7enet.com!
SFP Zach: i heard *se7enet.com* was a good site to learn everything you need to know about everything
SFP Psychopathic: word up to se7enet.com
UBBDev: se7enet.com shouts a big word up back to planetplastica.com and sfpunk.com!
SFP Zach: word up to sv20
SFP Zach: suck it se7enetbroken!
SFP Zach: bow to sv20!!
SFP Psychopathic: haha
UBBDev: sv20 rules all!
SFP Psychopathic: yeah it does
SFP Zach: i'm looking at it now
SFP Psychopathic: TRANSFORMERS, MORE THAN MEETS THE EYE!!
SFP Zach: bring it back as sv30
SFP Zach: no one will notice
SFP Psychopathic: i wil
SFP Psychopathic: will*
SFP Psychopathic: i notice everything
SFP Psychopathic: muahahahahahhaha!!!
SFP Zach: "i'll never share my tricks of trade! NEVER! buahah!"
SFP Psychopathic: NEVER!!!


UBBDev: So, thank you both for giving up your valuable time to give us this wonderful interview
UBBDev: Such interviews have never before graced the likes of UBBDev, and I'm sure the people will be profoundly touched by your awe-inspiring words of wisdom
SFP Zach: what?!
SFP Psychopathic: give us like 2 more questions
SFP Zach: it's over?
SFP Zach: im want a redo!
SFP Psychopathic: 2 more questions!!
SFP Psychopathic: you need more content
SFP Zach: 2 more!


UBBDev: Will we nuke Afghanistan?
SFP Zach: the people need to know!
SFP Psychopathic: yes, e-bombs are the way of the future!!
SFP Zach: if we don't, i will
SFP Psychopathic: send them back to the stone age!
SFP Zach: and the world will be mine!
SFP Psychopathic: and mine
SFP Zach: i guess
SFP Psychopathic: you gotta share zach
SFP Zach: word to alex and drew!!
SFP Psychopathic: let me have japan
SFP Zach: oh you mean the anime country?
SFP Psychopathic: ALEX AND DREW RUN IT!! (drew runs it more though)
SFP Zach: you know i heard a good anime site is *planetplastica.com*
SFP Zach: jamin runs that!
SFP Psychopathic: yeah it is, *planetplastica.com* is good too if you like video games
SFP Zach: but we run IT!
SFP Psychopathic: but if you're all up into graphics, *se7enet.com* is the place to go
SFP Psychopathic: punk fan eh? *sfpunk.com*
UBBDev: :-D
SFP Psychopathic: or if you want your own UBB to customize you can always look to *ubbdev.com*
SFP Zach: or hey, to buy a license for the ever so cheap $125, you could always vist *infopop.com*


UBBDev: Last question: If you could be anyone in the world, what panda would ride purple sleds down the street for pancakes?
SFP Psychopathic: hmmm... damn, that's a tough one.
SFP Zach: i would have to say ricky
SFP Psychopathic: yeah, i'd say me too.
SFP Zach: or maybe muckey mouse
SFP Psychopathic: Ok, time for us to ask YOU a question.
SFP Psychopathic: Why is OpenTopic around?
UBBDev: I have no idea.
SFP Zach: so they can make more money
UBBDev: Prolly because so many people griped about wanting a db-backend board product
SFP Psychopathic: Ok, here's another.
SFP Psychopathic: What's your favorite website? It's *planetplastica.com* isn't it?
SFP Zach: i thought it was *sfpunk.com* *winners of ubbdev member spotlight - oct 2001*
UBBDev: Yeah, it would definitely have to rank among planetplastica.com, sfpunk.com, se7enet.com and sicktwistedfetishes.com
SFP Zach: or pandaexpress.com
SFP Psychopathic: NO!
UBBDev: if you have Freenet, Content of Evil is good too!
SFP Zach: panda express keeps the panda!
UBBDev: panda express RUNS the panda!!
SFP Psychopathic: hey jamin, say "Any Final Words?"
SFP Zach: you need an about page on se7enetbroken


UBBDev: Any final words?
SFP Zach: slacker
SFP Zach: i would pretty much like to say "JAMIN RUNS IT!"
SFP Zach: and "HE SHOULD BE ADMIN AT UBBDEV"
SFP Zach: and "I WON JAMIN'S CHICKEN!"
SFP Psychopathic: Yes, first off, WORD UP TO ALEX AND DREW!!, then VISIT planetplastica.com!!, and JAMIN FOR UBBDEV ADMIN!!!
SFP Psychopathic: --the end--
UBBDev: Thanks guys!
SFP Zach: you're so cool, i thought you were two people
UBBDev: oh, gee... *blushes*
SFP Psychopathic: hahahah
UBBDev: shucks ma'am, t'werent nuttin
SFP Psychopathic: keep your nose clean zach
SFP Zach: whoo!
SFP Zach: word to drew and alex!!
SFP Psychopathic: copycat
SFP Zach: shaddup
SFP Psychopathic: jamin "great minds think alike"
SFP Psychopathic: *waits for him to say that*
SFP Zach: yea, put that!
SFP Zach: then they will think we are great!
UBBDev: Great minds surely do think alike
SFP Psychopathic: :-D
SFP Zach: whoo!
SFP Zach: i'm playing iosphere at *se7enet.com*!!
UBBDev: alright, ta ta fellows
UBBDev: thanks again
UBBDev: :-)
SFP Psychopathic: sure thing
SFP Psychopathic: it was fun

That's all for now, folks. I hope you enjoyed it (and I hope you didn't lose too many IQ points while perusing it... )

As always,
---Skorpion

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